Stories From Kiribati

A place where we could add stories and photos related to Kiribati!

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Insect of death

Posted by Amota Eromanga on March 30, 2017 at 8:40 AM Comments comments (0)

Two kids played among the plants just beside the road. They came across a green flying insect on one of the leaves. The girl quickly got hold of it. She was about to finish it when...

Boy:- Don't kill that insect or your father will die!

Girl:- My father died years ago.

Boy:- Well then, let the insect live and in return, you'll get a new dad.

Girl:- True? I think I like that.

Several da...

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Aran te reirei ae boou

Posted by Amota Eromanga on March 30, 2017 at 8:25 AM Comments comments (0)

Aran ngkoa te reirei are i tabon Takoronga i Betio bon Takoronga Primary School. Bon anne arana ae bati n kinaaki iai n ririki aika a bati. Ma e a manga bitaki arana nakon DaiNippon Primary School imwiin bobongan te DaiNippon Causeway are imarenan Betio ma Bairiki.

Bon te bwai ae moan te kakawaki bitakin aran te reirei aingaia are e a kaman karaoa ana katauraoi te reirei aio imwaain te botaki ni katokaara. Taiani marooro, kamataku ma te amwarake a kaman tia aron baireaia. Irua...

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Swearing letter

Posted by Amota Eromanga on March 2, 2017 at 6:25 AM Comments comments (0)

Inside the classroom, a teacher helps pupils on pronouncing letter Q properly.

Teacher: Class, say after me Q
Class: Q
Teacher: Again Q
Class: Q

Teacher notices that Little Taata is the only one who says nothing. 

Teacher: Taata, say after me Q
Taata: No, I won't say it
Teacher: Why?
Taata: I promised Mum not to swear

(Letter Q and the Kiribati word 'kiu' (person's bottom) sound the same)

Overseas to Overfence

Posted by Amota Eromanga on February 4, 2017 at 12:55 PM Comments comments (0)

One day, someone in the family was sick therefore a 9 year old boy was sent to call the Medical Assistance (MA) for help.

 

Arriving at the MA’s home, the boy called out, “Where’s the MA? Someone’s sick and needs help.”

 

“Sorry, he left yesterday. He went overseas!” said the wife.

 

The boy nodded then went back home. On his way he kept saying, “Overseas, overseas, overseas, ...” The wor...

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What does K1 mean?

Posted by Amota Eromanga on January 27, 2016 at 11:35 PM Comments comments (0)

At the end of her lesson on slang, the teacher asks her students.

Teacher: What does K1 mean?

Student (Ruuka): Awesome.

Student (Tina): One person.

Student (Tata): Ringworm.

Teacher: Ruuka you were right. Tina you were also right. Tata, why ringworm?

Tata: What is 1 in word?

Teacher: ONE.

Tata: Since 1 in word is ONE so K1 together in ...

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Man of my words

Posted by Amota Eromanga on January 27, 2016 at 7:40 AM Comments comments (1)

Ruka is a primary school dropout who likes singing in his village kava bars. Though his English isn't good, he knows few English country songs quite well.

One day he went to an interview for a job of an Assistant Community Worker. The interview was conducted in English. After answering the first question, he was disqualified.

Interviewers: Tell us something about you.

Ruka: I’m a man of my words, I mean what I say, my pledge is my bond, well...

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Tooth or Teeth?

Posted by Amota Eromanga on January 24, 2016 at 11:05 AM Comments comments (2)

One afternoon in a boarding school, a local teacher came across a very stubborn student. The boy would not listen to what the teacher told him to do and he even talked back.

The teacher tried not to lose control. But in the end he failed. He finally grabbed the boy by his shirt with his left hand, pushed him against the wall of the building. Then with his right fist held right at the boy’s face, he shouted angrily at him in English, ''I can punch you on the face, and I ...

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Star or diamond?

Posted by Amota Eromanga on January 20, 2016 at 11:20 PM Comments comments (0)

Grandpa was fixing his motorbike. He needed a star to remove some screws but wasn’t among his tools. He looked around and saw his 8 year old grandson. He called and asked him, “Tata, I need a star. Please go and borrow it from our neighbour.”

 

Tata worried that sooner or later he would forget the name of the tool, so he thought of a way that will help him not forget. Luckily he remembered his favourite song at school ‘Twinkle twinkle little star’...

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The Best Excuse

Posted by Amota Eromanga on May 19, 2015 at 4:40 AM Comments comments (0)

Tom is in Grade 1. He doesn't lIke going to school. Today he decides not to go to school again so he needs a good excuse.

Mother:- It's time to go to school. Hurry up!

Tom:- Mom, I'm not going to school today. I think I'm sick.

Mother (rather angry):- What's wrong? Head ache? Tooth ache? Stomach ache?

Tom (in a sick voice):- No. It's Saliva ache.

October is not the 8th Month

Posted by Amota Eromanga on May 14, 2015 at 2:10 AM Comments comments (0)

Teacher: Do you know what 'octo' means?

Children: Eight.

Teacher: Good! Please give few examples.

Children: Octopus, octagon, .... (thinking of more examples).

Teacher: October, 8th month of the year.

Children: ..... true??

Teacher: Yes! Okay, let's say the months and we count with our fingers.

Children & Teacher: 1Jan, 2 Feb, 3 Mar, 4 Apr, 5 May, 6 Jun, 7 Jul, 8 A...

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Ringworm

Posted by Amota Eromanga on May 12, 2015 at 2:30 AM Comments comments (0)

A village missionary conducted a religion interview exam to Grade 1 children in a primary school.

It was time for Tom, so the boy walked slowly to the missionary. Tom and the missionary now sat at the table facing each other.

The interview exam began:

Missionary:- Name the disease our Lord cured when he was on earth.

(Tom thought and thought. He looked side to side, up and down. Then he saw the ringworm on the missionary's hand)

Tom:- RINGWORM!


...
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Are you a boy or a girl?

Posted by Amota Eromanga on December 22, 2013 at 3:10 PM Comments comments (0)

A father was beating his son - an attempt to stop him from acting like a girl. After several beatings, the father asked, “Are you a boy or a girl?”

The son replied crying, “Dad, I am a girl”

“No no! This time I will tie and put you at the corner of the house for hours!” said the father. And he did what he said. Later, he came back with the same question, “Are you a boy or a girl?”

“Dad, I am a girl” c...

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Innocent slapped

Posted by Amota Eromanga on August 20, 2013 at 7:40 PM Comments comments (0)

Two men were having a friendly conversation. Around them sat several women. One of the men then noticed that his friend’s willy (penis) could be seen clearly from under his lavalava.

The women saw the man’s willy so they stopped listening and began laughing.

“Oh, no! Women laugh at my friend’s willy. How do I secretly let him know?” thought the man. He stopped listening, looked down then up and even tapped his fingers.

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Wherever you go I go

Posted by Amota Eromanga on July 16, 2013 at 4:25 AM Comments comments (0)

The event below did happen on one of the outer islands.

A young Kiribati man approached a Peace Corp Volunteer (lady) who was buying something at the village store. Though the man knew very little English, he said to the lady, “I love you”. Surprised of what she just heard, the lady looked at the man with puzzle eyes.

Knowing that she still listened, the young man continued, “Yes, wherever you go, I go”

Before she coul...

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Meow or Cock-a-doodle-doo?

Posted by Amota Eromanga on June 24, 2013 at 6:30 PM Comments comments (0)

After staring at the dish in front of him, the customer asked the waiter about the food. Instead of speaking, the waiter replied with a sound, “Cock-a-doodle-doo”

The customer (who had been studying animal bones for years) shook his head and out of his mouth came, “Meow meow”

 

Mosquito Net

Posted by Amota Eromanga on March 16, 2013 at 1:45 PM Comments comments (2)

Ruuka was an alcoholic who used to steal things and exchanged them for his wine.

One dark night while his parents were fast asleep, he quietly untied their mosquito net, and then left to the nearby local bar.

Soon, the father woke up from the mosquitoes bites. He woke his wife to check the net was properly placed over them. The wife stretched out her arms. Nothing happened. She swung her arms around, then in circles but nothing happened. Finally, she stood up slowly hoping to feel...

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How many legs do pigs have?

Posted by Amota Eromanga on March 16, 2013 at 4:10 AM Comments comments (0)

Ruuka was an alcoholic who used to steal things and exchanged them for wine. 

In one occasion (family feast), he was asked by his mother to kill the pig. After killing, cutting up and cleaning, he hid one of the pig’s legs under the small bush. Then he brought the meat home to his mother.

“Hey! Ruuka, where is the other leg? The fourth one?” asked the mother.

“Mother! Are you saying that your pig has four legs when all pigs have only three?̶...

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Electric kettle

Posted by Amota Eromanga on November 28, 2012 at 1:10 PM Comments comments (0)

While staying with his children on South Tarawa, the electric kettle caught his attention.

“Wow. Amazing kettle! The cable is put into the wall and the water boils.” thought the old man. “No more open fire if I bring it with me.

He finally flew back to his home on an outer island with the kettle. He invited his neighbors for a chat. As he was being watched, he poured water into his kettle and just put the end of the cable into his wall. Then ...

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Dirty minded road

Posted by Amota Eromanga on November 18, 2012 at 1:40 PM Comments comments (0)

The bus is crowded so the little boy has to sit on his grandma’s lap. When their bus reaches the tip of Taborio village, the road there is quite rough causing the slight ups and downs to passengers on their seats. Feeling the movements beneath him, the boy quickly stands up, looks seriously at his grandma and asks, “Hey, yo...

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Driving license

Posted by Amota Eromanga on November 13, 2012 at 1:25 AM Comments comments (0)

A strict constable was on a road patrol when a motorbike drove by. He raised his left hand demanding the rider to stop. The rider slowed down and stopped just beside him.

“Got driving license?” he asked seriously.

Having heard that the constable had no formal schooling, the driver answered, “Oh, yes.”

“Let me see!” the constable added.

The man put his hand into his pocket, took out a piece of...

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